i love this life🤍

 hello. 

jan. 16- sunday i had a struggle with the ranchers sitting up with the youth girls because even on my off days, i never had any space from them. well. i was doing dishes with one of the ranchers that sat up front. i had just asked her how she was. alittle bit later she told that it was so special to talk with me up there and she liked knowing that i was just a few people down. wow. what a hit. it did my heart good. it felt like God was talking right to me. i have to remember. these girls are people and i need to build a connection with them.

 therapy was cancelled for us authorities. since it was cancelled, i spent the morning with triz😊right after lunch, i mixed up a cake for a rancher's birthday party we were having in the evening. i made a dalgona chocolate coffee layer cake. would recommend. if i made it again, i would like the frosting to be stiffer. after authorities meeting there were zooms and getting ready for the party. for supper we had stacked enchiladas, green salad, and chips. 😋 

jan. 17- happy 18th birthday to our rancher! i made a breakfast she really likes. then off to therapy. she got her birthday gift from her parents. so in the evening, we video called them while she opened it. it was so fun how her mom had individually wrapped each item. 😊

jan. 18-this was a hard day for the ranchers that read their impact letters. it brings up alot of things. the one i was in, made me cry. 

a funny thing from this day. one of my girls said, "excuse me, ms. brooke?" 

"yes" 

"i want to go home."

"ok. if you want to go home, you can start walking."

some of the other ranchers came in and were exclaiming. one said "you won't be here for my 16 birthday!" other things were said, such as, "we will have to have a farewell for you". we even offered to help her pack. to say the least; she was not amused.

jan. 19- mentor training in the morning and i had off in the afternoon. i hung my hammock out and decided to read/browse my phone and enjoy some outdoor time, but it was windy and cold. i weathered it for alittle while but then decided it wasn't worth it. (i even had brought along my blanket). in the evening i went to tyson's. they left and went to PTM. i hung out with their girls setting puzzle and played a game. 

jan. 20- i woke up before 8. (um. this is the day i can sleep in. brain. what are you doing?) i finished watching a documentary about these 4 guys that roade mustangs from mexico to canada. so cool. oh, i really want to go to the grand canyon. i had stayed at mr. todd's. they were getting company so i washed the sheets and made the bed i had slept in. i went to the city park in siloam and took a walk. i brought my sketchbook along and worked on a doodle ;) i went back to the ranch and spent alittle time with triz, drank coffee, and relaxed. in the evening, i went to youth. :)

jan. 21- is life every normal around here ? well, what is exactly normal  ? usually we clean house in the morning but this day ms. lora and ms. sharla came over. we did a training called the outward mindset. mr. todd's came late afternoon and evening. we did cleaning, had supper, and the ranchers and mr. todd's played rook on rook off. i finished up some cleaning and worked on the laundry. oh, and i got a roast ready for sunday lunch.

jan. 22- we stayed home from church to finish the outward mindset training. i'm  so glad we could do this training. it really has made me stop and think differently. we ate roast, mashed potatoes/gravy , and fruit for lunch. had quiet time. did horse chores. mr. todd's came for evening duty. as they were leaving, i was instructed to go straight to bed. i didn't listen very well. we mentor's instead had an ice cream party and hung out. 

jan. 23-morning duty - chores - horsemanship. this was my morning and i could spend it with the ranchers. triz had been doing so well not biting me. well this day she definitely tried. maybe she was testing me to see if i would keep the boundaries? but after i worked with her awhile. I GOT ON HER BAREBACK. ok, this is so exciting. ! i realized i need to do some study on riding. but still i was so happy ✨ mr. todd had slipped on some ice as he was trying to load the aircompresser in the baby truck. he fell and his elbow was bleeding. he came in as we were doing after meal chores. he had blood on his sleeve and it really affected some of the girls. one thought she might faint. and another  helpless or hopeless, i cant remember and she was scared he might die. also it brought up feelings of if her dad would get hurt. we had authorities meeting. tried to figure out what is best for our rancher that is not motivated to work on her life. and many other things. ms. anna is sick, so she was not there. i offered to do chores so mr. todd could be in on a zoom call. by the end of the meeting, i was exhausted. i cried a few tears, went outside and did jumping jacks and then went to face chores. i got to blanket triz, wash ms. sharla's tahoe, and help a rancher think about after you scrub car mats that you shouldn't leave the soap on them. she really loved to clean the mats and felt very happy. another one of my ranchers mentioned she would like to use the pressure washer. after i did the one side, i let her do the other. it was just really a fun time being with them. 🤍 

jan. 24- my day to make breakfast :) ms. katie + ms. jenna took three of the girls and left for therapy. the other two stayed with me. it was a quiet morning at home. the one rancher was having difficulties because she didn't think she would get therapy. it really made her mind stop working very well. once it was straightened out. she was doing better :) i got lunch together and we left to the therapy office. i left the two girls there and then i was off duty. i made a couple stops before heading home. i was getting ready to meet a friend for coffee when a message came in that ms. sharla needed a hand. i quick went and helped her. and it honestly took more time to drive out there than to actually help her. i then went and had coffee with a friend. we sat there and talked for hours and watched the snow flakes gently fall. 🤍 i went to mr. todd's for supper and the evening.

jan. 25- i didn't get out of bed until way after 11. 🙊 it's hard for me to calm down and just relax and not ALWAYS have to be doing something. now today has been spent very low key. there is snow outside and i love that. 

i love this thought from this writing i read "the dark place is where the treasures are." it scares me to go to those dark places because what will i find. but i'm realizing that.. that is where the treasures are. i want to go there and heal the things that need healing.

ok. that's all for now. i hope each of you know that when God made each of you, He said, "it is good."

please continue to send up prayers.

xo,

ms. brooke